why are blonde jokes so short?
so men can remember them
this took an unexpected turn
Not if you just asked for directions.
if someone calls you a slut, break their fucking neck without even hesitating or saying a single word and as they lay there on the ground dead, lean down close to their corpse and whisper
“slut means the end in swedish”
this is the most popular post i’ve ever made and its still fuckin going and i am GLAD
The Smiths- Bigmouth Strikes Again
Sweetness, sweetness I was only joking
When I said I’d like to smash every tooth
In your head
Oh…sweetness, sweetness, I was only joking
When I said by rights you should be
Bludgeoned in your bed
I hate brushing my teeth at night because that signifies that you can’t have anymore food and I’m just never ready for that kind of commitment
it also makes me feel like I can’t take any more bong rips :’(